Uncertainty

To say the second half of this school year has been difficult seems like an understatement.  Between dealing with a sick co-worker, having double duty for about two months, the busyness of April and May (testing, Spring Celebration, etc.), budget issues, and everything going on with the economy, it’s been an emotional ride.

The last week in particular has been very up and down like a rollercoaster.  The board of commissioners make me want to scream (yeah, let’s take $4.8 million of the $5.1 million in cuts we need from the schools) and everyone else is just trying to do what they can to save jobs.  I won’t go any further on that…might get ugly.  Long story short, I know most of this isn’t what anyone would have asked for or wants to deal with but in the end, if people would make smart choices for the good of everyone (or the majority, can’t take care of everyone, this is reality…) instead of what they want, budgeting would make a lot more sense and a lot more efficient.

At present it appears some classroom teachers may be reassigned or be moved among grade levels which in the bigger picture is ok – there’s still a job for you.  What has been difficult is both hearing and not hearing anything regarding special areas (music, art, computer, PE, Spanish).  Hearing all of the speculation and different things from different people then hearing that another school heard something different has been somewhat overwhelming because we aren’t hearing anything concrete.  I know it’s hard for those having to make those decisions and I also know that this wasn’t their choice – they don’t want to be in this situation and they didn’t ask for this to happen.  I know there are things that you have to wait on…state budgets to know the county’s budget among other things.

Anyway, before I ramble on anymore at present it just seems I have a job for right now there are just some changes that are probably in store.  Some of the possibilities (and this is not all of them, I don’t know what is being discussed for next year) include shortened contacts and I’m at two schools, things stay as they are except I’m the only Spanish teacher at my school and I get shortened contacts, or…no job.  Right now the county is set to vote on the budget for Union Co. next week then they are waiting on the state budget to be able to figure things out a bit better.  The state budget is supposed to be voted on in early-mid July.  After that, things have to be worked out for the county and…right now they are saying it’s possible some people (which in my pessimism…or looking at realistically considering the reality of things right now… I’m reading as “electives/special areas teachers”) may not know whether they have a job or not until mid-August.

That’s painful to swallow and I’m apt to ponder the possibilities.  That being said, Pastor Steven‘s sermon Sunday couldn’t have been more timely…  Worry and anxiety are sins.  I’m working on those.  As I was leaving school today I thought about another sermon where he was talking about the fact that the times you need to worship and praise God the most is when you don’t want to.  And this afternoon it wasn’t necessarily that I didn’t want to, it was that I needed to in order to get into the right mindset, to let the anxiety and worry go.  That helped me remember…

God is…NOT

  • incompetent
  • forgetful
  • indifferent

Preached it to myself just like Pastor Steven said we should!  haha.  I was also reminded of the following verse…

Philippians 4:6 (New International Version)

6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Tomorrow is going to be a little harder than the last day of school in previous years…  I found out a first grade teacher I love dearly is moving and won’t be back next year, the unknown about the coming school year will make saying goodbye to the kids (K-5) a little more difficult and at the same time make me cherish my time with them even more, and on the workdays to follow time with my colleagues will be more important.

In other news, this brightened up my day.  It’s amazing.

Zack Morris : Late Night w/ Jimmy Fallon

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