Direction in the Middle of a Funk

I haven’t really written much lately.  There’s been a lot going on in the last couple of months.  I can’t even remember if I wrote about the fact that I’m teaching multimedia and computers now?!

I’ve had to do a lot of thinking and soul searching lately and I still don’t know what’s going to happen over the summer.  Let’s do a short recap, bullet style.

  • Took over multimedia/computer classes in mid-January as one teacher left the middle school to go teach drafting.  Also an effort to potentially keep a job for next year since my position is only supposed to last one year.
  • Been doing the mentor stuff all year.  Kind of awkward at times since I’ve been in several different positions throughout this year but going ok.
  • Pulled of The Amazing Race with the global committee at school one night in February.  Good turn out and pretty fun.
  • Still going to World Languages meetings to keep up hours for my teaching license in Spanish.
  • Global teacher meetings remained awesome and I’m going to Chapel Hill in June for a Global Leadership conference that’s being paid for by the county.
  • Registered to take another PRAXIS II test – Middle School Social Studies – in May.  Spending a lot of time with a SS textbook.  There’s the possibility that I could either A: do the multimedia or global studies class next year OR move into a 7th grade SS class if I pass and get this as an add on to my NC teaching license.
  • March 22 or something – my white Taurus dies.  Good riddance.  Sort of.  Had that car and no payment for at least 4 years.  Maybe 5?
  • Hunt for a new car.  Yuck.  A car payment.
  • Yay.  A new car.  No ridiculous car problems to deal with.  Hooray Effie Beauregard!
  • Oh hurray this means I need a part time job.  But what?
  • Spring Break.  Lots of reading.
  • Oh crap.  They’re cutting all teaching assistants in the county.  I understand doing this early to give people a chance to look for jobs and that they’ll probably hire back over the summer as state/federal funding becomes more clear.  Hard to take right now though.
  • Dr. Davis is retiring.  He’s been a good man staying in the job of superintendent while some idiots in other districts (cough cough CMS cough cough) decide to leave in the middle of hard times to take a job with a tv station.  HAH.  Very curious to see who gets hired and what effect it will have on different jobs and the next years for UCPS.

This all leads up to yesterday which was a really crappy morning thanks to a student.  I felt like crap.  She felt like crap and it was a morning that really made me miss elementary school.  I had an observation later in the day.  That went alright.  Thankfully, the day ended AWESOME with a very fun scavenger hunt in honor of the birthday of one very awesome Kelly Draddy.  And Team Naked Man won so that was pretty neat.

I feel like I’m in a funk right now though.  So much is up in the air about what next year will bring.  If I pass the SS PRAXIS, do I want to do the 7th grade social studies class?  Do I want to stay in the multimedia?  If I stay in the multimedia, that job may only exist one more year before cuts go even deeper.  And I say that with relative confidence that this whole downturn in education isn’t done yet, sadly.  Do I want to stay in a middle school setting?  Do I want to see what other jobs are out there for Spanish?  Do I want to look for a job in a charter school or private school (there are oh so many ups and downs there as there are with public schools)?  Do I want to stay in education?  I really love planning and curriculum development (which I sorta did the first half of this year with the global thing) and I love the possibility of doing social studies.  I loved it when I was in middle school and I really like the 7th grade SS teachers.

But then yesterday morning was just crap and with everything going on with funding, the changing of the guard with the superintendent and the lack of respect that has been going around with this job (both on a state and federal level too – HELLO LACK OF FUNDING) plus the stupidity of testing, I’m over it in some ways.  Last night I was talking with some friends about it and I’m grateful for their thoughts – what about doing translating or interpreting was the suggestion.  I could easily do that if there were more of those things out there.  Those are really obscure jobs you have to search for.  Hard to find.  At least in my looking.  And I have looked.

What else do I enjoy doing?  Writing.  Obviously working with kids.  Language.  Travel.  I’m a detail oriented person and I love organization.  I love what I do throughout the week and on weekends with my church and helping write some of the lessons.  I have no clue what that job might be that takes all of those into consideration.

What I do know is I’m in a catch-22.  I have a new car payment.  Won’t have a raise yet again this year.  Rent is going up.  My school paycheck (if I’m with the district next school year…based on how certain things turn out) in August will be cut in half.  And I definitely need a part time job right now to add some other income to help build things up over the summer to maybe pay off some more on my car.

There are 2 options with the school for next year as of right now – multimedia or potentially Social Studies.  I can look for another teaching job or something else entirely.  I’m honestly just not sure what my heart wants to do right now.  Education in general is exhausting me mentally just thinking about where it’s headed.  On the other hand, if I could just be with the kids and not have to deal with some things, I know where I’d stay.

I’ve taken action steps – this year I’ve been myself and some of that I think has made me invaluable, I’ve gotten back into a classroom (even though it’s outside my comfort zone, kinda), I’m taking another PRAXIS to add a certification area, I’ve updated my resume, and I’m on job sites pretty regularly right now.  Just a matter of what to do next and I probably won’t know that until the end of the year.

And now I’m probably rambling and repeating things I’ve already said, just in different terms.  Hence this is probably a good reason this post has this title.  I’m in a funk job wise and am seriously praying for some direction.  If anyone has some fabulous insight (or a hint on what my dream job might be or an idea…or offer), I’m all ears.


2 thoughts on “Direction in the Middle of a Funk

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